


Hit me with your best shot

by Miss_Kitten



Category: Deadpool (2016), Deadpool - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Blood, F/M, Gore, Language, Mild Angst, Mild Fluff, Stalking, Wade's POV
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-15
Updated: 2016-06-15
Packaged: 2018-07-15 05:46:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7210418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miss_Kitten/pseuds/Miss_Kitten
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Reader, a mercenary, meets Deadpool, who instantly takes a liking in her. And being who he is, he starts stalking her, which makes her angry. An accident happens, but Wade laughs it off.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hit me with your best shot

You walk into the pub, flipping golden card between your fingers. You got another job done, which means a really nice payment, which means you won’t be kicked out of your tiny flat. You can’t be happier.

With a wide grin you come to the bar and slide the card to Weasel.

“My money, please,” you ask politely and, with a happy smile, he places before you a beautiful, round thousand dollars.

“Here you go, Y/N, and damn, girl, you’re slaying!”

“Well, I’m just earning money to live,” you shrug, but joy is bubbling inside you. You really needed those money, so recently, you have been taking every case possible. Some of the dudes were pissed off, but after you did puppy eyes at them, they shook it off. They really adored you and you liked them back. Also, they knew how hard it was to earn a decent amount of cash.

“You know that you’re leading in Dead Pool? Guys don’t show it, but I think they want you to calm down.”

“Not happening, pal,” you answer with a giggle and take a seat, “now, can I have gin with tonic? And a beer for you, on me of course.”

“Sure can do,” he smiles brightly at you as you hide your money to your purse, your smile broadening.

“Oh, what are we celebrating?” a cheerful voice calls from your right and you shoot a glance there, immediately tearing your eyes from a man.

“Dude, for fuck’s sake, cover your face. I’m already having nightmares and I only just looked at you,” you spit with disgust, but the man lets out a chuckle. Weasel, in the meantime, hands you your drink and takes a sip of his beer.

“Wade, don’t harass the lady.”

“You’re Wade? Wade fucking Wilson? Deadpool guy?” you ask, surprised that you really met him. He was kind of a legend here, though you didn’t come across him, before his, so to say, transformation. You only heard he was after some weird mutant guy and then joined X-men or something.

“Yeah, that’s me,” Wade retorts with a proud smirk and you risk a longer gaze at his face. It seems that he’s made of one big scar. “You heard of me?” he asks in overly moved way, but you just ignore it. Weasel once told you Wade is rather overdramatic.

“I did, but no one warned me that you’re that ugly. God, how can you look at yourself in a mirror?”

“I don’t,” he says sincerely, shrugging. You sigh and down your drink, winking at Weasel.

“I’ll come by tomorrow, can you find me a job, buddy?”

“Always, Y/N,” he assures you and waves you as you walk out of the place and head to your flat, taking out your cell to order a pizza.

_Damn, she’s hot!_

_Oh, hello there! I’m Deadpool, but you already guessed, didn’t you? Apparently, after the undeniable success of a movie about the greatest Marvel character ever, which is me, of course, I also appear in those fanfiction things. Weird, but what you gonna do?_

_Anyway, back to Y/N. My dear friend  spilled a word or two about her some time ago and I was dying to meet her. She is the best of the best around here, and gosh, those skinny jeans! She looks delicious. Also, she’s stealing the coolest jobs from dudes, who are like twice as tall and wide as her. That has to mean she’s awesome, right?_

_So, I’m gonna do what I can to get her. Which, in my case, includes walking behind her, watching her every move (I have to take care of her, good guys do that, don’t they?), learning every detail about her. Nothing unusual, just good old stalking. I’m not a creep after all, guys, I just want to know Y/N better, cause she’s smoking sexy._

Next day, as you head to your next target, you notice a tall guy in a hoodie, standing in the alley. He looks oddly familiar but you can’t remember where did you see him.

The hoodie dude is leaning against block’s wall as you walk out.

The same guy is sitting in a park not so far away from you, but you still don’t know where you know him from.

Then, you notice him in the mall as you shop for something nice for yourself to celebrate another pretty sum of money.

He is also there when you close your curtains, but you can’t see his face. However, seeing the exactly same man, following you for past 3 days makes you a tiny bit anxious. It’s like you’ve grown another shadow and you don’t enjoy having a tail. It won’t help you if something surprising occurs during your work.

“Someone’s following me,” you announce as Weasel hands you a bottle of beer.

“Like in a creepy way or super cute romantic movies way?”

“Definitely creepy. I’m not dating anyone, so no for romantic shit,” you say bitterly and take a sip of cold beer. Because of this situation you have troubles with sleeping – you feel as if someone is in your room, staring at you all the time. You feel endangered and you are tired of it.

“Y/N, maybe you pissed somebody off?”

“Naaah, me? Oh, wait, try every other mercenary in this place, I’m sure they’re not mad or anything,” you bark out, rolling your eyes. You are aware that bitching at Weasel won’t make things better, but at that moment you don’t have anyone to yell at. Besides, he knows that you’re upset and doesn’t get angry because of your mood.

“Hey, I have an idea. You said that this guy knows where you live, right? Take a knife and scare the shit out of him.”

“Well, that’s…” you blink few times before leaning over the counter and giving him a kiss on his cheek, “genius!”

“Always here to help. Just without getting into fight. I don’t wanna get hurt, you know, my face is too precious.”

“Yeah, yeah, pretty boy,” you smile sweetly at him, in your mind already creating a plan how to approach that creepy fellow.

____

He’s there again. Standing across the street, hidden in a shadow so that you can’t see his face. You sigh heavily, turning off the lights and grabbing your dagger. You won’t let him bother you anymore, you simply can’t stand it.

You climb out of the window in your bedroom and quietly sneak down the fire escapes. They’re leading to the back of the building so you can easily round the block and come out on his left, so he has no way to run away before you reach him.

And this is precisely what you do. You step around the building and head to the guy and, as you assumed, he can’t even make a step aside when you grab him by the back of his neck and push him to the block.

He doesn’t say a word and neither do you. He doesn’t even fight to be released, he just walks where you lead him. And you pull him into the staircase, then up to your flat, which you open with a kick and immediately points a dagger at him when he’s inside.

“You fucking perv, what the hell do you want?!”

“Oh, so you like it rough? I can be a perv, no problem,” said perv calls happily, pushing away his hoddie and in front of you appears the ugliest dude you have ever laid eyes upon.

“You again? Can’t you just leave me alone? I don’t wanna see your hideous mug, Wade, it haunts me!”

“But, Y/N, the more you look at it the faster you get used to it, I guarantee,” he answers in a soothing voice and you sigh, shaking with anger. It was Wade, it was him all the time and he was stupid enough to not give you any sign. He gave you unnecessary fears and worries and god, how much you want to punch him!

“You’re a bloody asshole, Wade. You’re the biggest assbutt I’ve ever met and you’re not even sorry!” you throw your arms in a hopeless gesture, staring at him with mad expression.

“I just wanted to know you better,” he says timidly and that’s when you lost it. With a wild growl, you weave your arm forward, aiming to slap him in the face, but for god only knows what reason you move the hand with the dagger, which now smoothly slides through his throat.

In next second all you can see is blood streaming from Wade’s neck. You drop to your knees beside him as he leans in, choking, trying to stop the blood with his hands.

“I’m so sorry, Wade, I didn’t mean to, oh my god, let me call 911,” you mutter, fervently looking for something to press against the wound and when you find nothing you yank off your shirt and press it against his neck. And then you hear it.

He’s laughing. He’s practically doubling with cackle and you can’t find anything funny in this situation. He’s bleeding out, what the fuck is he giggling about?  

“If I knew it takes some blood to get you out of your tee, I would’ve broken my nose. And you should’ve seen your face, Y/N!” he pants, still out of breath because of laughter, looking at you with amused face and you frown.

“What the hell are you talking about? Have you lost your mind, dude?”

“See?” he takes away now soaking t-shirt and you look at his skin with puzzled expression, “nothing. Not even a scar. Well, apart from the huge one, but that’s how I look now,” he shrugs and you straighten your back, your mouth falls agape.

“What. The. Fuck?”

“Long story short, I had cancer, some mysterious guy told me he can cure it, they took me to a warehouse, where a Brit named Francis gave me a mutation triggering serum, or something like that, and then the cancer disappeared taking my beauty with it. Now I’m ugly as fuck, but nothing can kill me.”

“Holy smoking puppies,” you breath out, falling on a sofa, trying to register and understand what he has just said.

“So, you’re like Doctor Who?”

“More like Wolvie, considering super healing powers,” he smiles as he takes a seat next to you.

“Sorry about your hoddie. Want me to wash it?”

“If I take it off, you’ll have to look at more scars, Y/N, are you sure you can handle it?”

“I’m a big girl, I can deal with it,” you smirk, reaching for his blouse. He gives it to you and you head to washing machine, collecting your t-shirt on your way there. You turn in on and sit next to Wade, elbowing him.

“Fancy a movie with me, mister Pool?”

“Oh, is it a date?” he gasps, clenching a hand over his chest.

“It can be, if you wanna,” you smile teasingly and he grins back at you, excitement evident on his face.

“Netlix and chill?”

“Just Netlix, Wade, no chill for you tonight. Or upcoming month. You deserve a tough punishment for stalking me.”

“Okay, okay, whatever…”

_Aaaaaand it’s time for you to go, guys. Y/N said she won’t give me ‘the chill’ but we all know that she will. She likes me, isn’t it obvious? And, because I’m charming and stuff, I am going to…_

“You’re not getting laid, Wade. And now shut up and enjoy the movie,” you scold and pat him on his head, trying to ignore what he’s mumbling under his nose.

_Girl, of course, I’m getting some tonight, I’m watching X-men with you, I deserve a pretty ‘thank you’ for it, don’t I? You can put a bag on my face, I don’t mind, as long as I – ouch! Stop hitting me!_


End file.
